Why I struggle with reality: it just never meets my expectations.
Example:
I ordered pasta at lunch the other day (at a really nice restaurant): pasta with arrabiata sauce (my absolute favorite kind of pasta in Italy. I loved it at every single place I had it and each time it was a little different, so it wasn't a one shot wonder kind of deal.) At lunch here? Disappointed to the point of tears. The pasta was undercooked, the arrabiata was not arrabiata, and I couldn't drown my sorrows in wine because I forgot my ID. Translation: Italy ruined me. I cannot survive in the real world.
Saturday, June 15, 2013
Monday, June 10, 2013
A First Attempt
I've tried, at several points in my life, to keep some sort of record of how my life was going. Besides this current blog, my latest (and most successful) attempt was the blog I kept this past spring about my adventures abroad. But I've been trying this out for quite a while now with varying degrees of success.
In fact, the other day we found one of my first attempts at journaling. Apparently, when I was 7 I decided I would write every day in this little Lady and the Tramp journal someone had given me. I did really well... for all of 4 days. After those first 10 pages of seven year old hand writing, you get nothing but blanks.
Reading through this diary was the highlight of my day. Saying I was dumb as a rock when I was 7 years old would be insulting to rocks. I really just could not figure out the whole words/spelling/writing concept. Even the alphabet was a challenge for me: I made my J's backwards, a small enough problem for most people; after all, how often does the letter J pop up in an elementary vocabulary. Then you look at my name and see that not just one, but both of my names start with J. It really should have been the first letter I learned how to write, instead it took me most of elementary school to figure it out. Anyway, back to the point, between the things I thought were worth writing about and my atrocious handwriting and spelling, this little journal was a goldmine of laughs.
With the exception of my blog from the spring, most of my journalling attempts have resembled the above: I don't think a single attempt made it through the first month. Here's to hoping I uncovered the secret to success by doing this all online.
In fact, the other day we found one of my first attempts at journaling. Apparently, when I was 7 I decided I would write every day in this little Lady and the Tramp journal someone had given me. I did really well... for all of 4 days. After those first 10 pages of seven year old hand writing, you get nothing but blanks.
Reading through this diary was the highlight of my day. Saying I was dumb as a rock when I was 7 years old would be insulting to rocks. I really just could not figure out the whole words/spelling/writing concept. Even the alphabet was a challenge for me: I made my J's backwards, a small enough problem for most people; after all, how often does the letter J pop up in an elementary vocabulary. Then you look at my name and see that not just one, but both of my names start with J. It really should have been the first letter I learned how to write, instead it took me most of elementary school to figure it out. Anyway, back to the point, between the things I thought were worth writing about and my atrocious handwriting and spelling, this little journal was a goldmine of laughs.
With the exception of my blog from the spring, most of my journalling attempts have resembled the above: I don't think a single attempt made it through the first month. Here's to hoping I uncovered the secret to success by doing this all online.
Friday, June 7, 2013
A Review: Confessions of a Shopaholic
I decided that I was going to ease myself in to reading myself to a better place, so the first book I read from my Quarter-Life-Crisis shelf was Confessions of a Shopaholic by Sophie Kinsella. This book was added to my shelf from the http://www.lovetwenty.com/ book list.
What I have to say about this book.
It was an adorable little book. I have not seen the movie, so I really didn't know what to expect. The writing made me feel like the protagonist was just telling me about her life, and it was therefore a really fun and easy read. However all that being said, I still struggled through this book. I'm relatively money wise and I just couldn't understand how someone could get so into trouble and not realize that something really has got to change.
Did I learn any lessons?
Sure. It has made me think that I should start my budget spreadsheets now so I don't forget and fall behind after I graduate. The girl is a compulsive liar in the book, and it made me think that I should really think before I speak (because I too, lie out my ass sometimes).
Favorite lines:
"I mean, we're two civilized adults, aren't we? Adults just don't do things like that."
"And anyway, who defines 'real life'? Who says 'real life' is property ladders and hideous pearl earrings? 'Shit-boring tedious life,' more like."
What I have to say about this book.
It was an adorable little book. I have not seen the movie, so I really didn't know what to expect. The writing made me feel like the protagonist was just telling me about her life, and it was therefore a really fun and easy read. However all that being said, I still struggled through this book. I'm relatively money wise and I just couldn't understand how someone could get so into trouble and not realize that something really has got to change.
Did I learn any lessons?
Sure. It has made me think that I should start my budget spreadsheets now so I don't forget and fall behind after I graduate. The girl is a compulsive liar in the book, and it made me think that I should really think before I speak (because I too, lie out my ass sometimes).
Favorite lines:
"I mean, we're two civilized adults, aren't we? Adults just don't do things like that."
"And anyway, who defines 'real life'? Who says 'real life' is property ladders and hideous pearl earrings? 'Shit-boring tedious life,' more like."
Thursday, June 6, 2013
An Ideal Career
Getting my life together means putting together a career path. I've spent the last three years trying to put together a career path and am no farther now than I was then.
If I could do absolutely anything, what would I do? I would write. Preferably Fiction and preferably Young Adult. Something you could pick up one day, put it down a few days later, and (hopefully) not think you just wasted the last few days on a headache inducing book. I don't care if no one will read it a decade from the time it is published. I'm not even sure I care if it never sells more than a few copies, or even gets published at all. All I know is I've got stories running through my head all the time and I like to write them down when the voices get to loud and demanding. And now I sound like I'm crazy.
In an ideal world I would run off to my apartment in Gozo after college and spend my days writing on my balcony overlooking the bay. Alas, reality intrudes and reminds me that I'm going to be over my head in debt from college loans. Even if I did write something good enough to be published in the next year, I doubt it would pay off all the bills heading my way. I guess its time to find something a little more dependable.
If I could do absolutely anything, what would I do? I would write. Preferably Fiction and preferably Young Adult. Something you could pick up one day, put it down a few days later, and (hopefully) not think you just wasted the last few days on a headache inducing book. I don't care if no one will read it a decade from the time it is published. I'm not even sure I care if it never sells more than a few copies, or even gets published at all. All I know is I've got stories running through my head all the time and I like to write them down when the voices get to loud and demanding. And now I sound like I'm crazy.
In an ideal world I would run off to my apartment in Gozo after college and spend my days writing on my balcony overlooking the bay. Alas, reality intrudes and reminds me that I'm going to be over my head in debt from college loans. Even if I did write something good enough to be published in the next year, I doubt it would pay off all the bills heading my way. I guess its time to find something a little more dependable.
Wednesday, June 5, 2013
A First Step
So one of my goals in getting my life together it to also get my health and fitness under control. I've never been one of those people who obsess about weight because I've always been athletic and active. Super skinny may look great in clothes, but I've never met a super skinny girl who could hit a volleyball harder or swim a 100 meters faster than one with muscle. But lately (like the last 4 years lately), I've been lazy. Even worse, my lazy food habits have caught up with me.
Freshman 15? Please. I decided to step up my game and gain those 15 lbs before I even stepped foot on my college campus. And then I gained another 10 for luck. In the last year I may have lost 5 of those 25 lbs. Now I'm aiming to lose the other 20, just enough to get me back where I was when I was mostly active and mostly healthy.
On the one hand it shouldn't be too hard: 3 months in Italy changed my palate so I no longer have a raging sweet tooth and most other junk food doesn't hold a draw for me either. Since I'm still summer-job-less I have plenty of extra time to get a workout in every day.
One of my biggest challenges is my aversion to running. I have never understood people who can just get up and run 5 miles. As far as sports go I've played volleyball, kicked ass as a soccer keeper, and spent the last two years of high school learning to be a fish on the swim team. See a trend? There's next to no running involved in any of them. Its the chicken and the egg question: what came first my love of these sports or my distaste for running?
So to try to get over this, I'm doing a modified version of the Couch to 5K program (check it out at the link below). Instead of going exactly with the time part of it, I do distance intervals since I usually run on the beach and have these nifty lifeguard towers as my check points. With any luck, by the end of the summer, I'll actually be able to run straight from one pier to the other.
http://www.c25k.com/
Freshman 15? Please. I decided to step up my game and gain those 15 lbs before I even stepped foot on my college campus. And then I gained another 10 for luck. In the last year I may have lost 5 of those 25 lbs. Now I'm aiming to lose the other 20, just enough to get me back where I was when I was mostly active and mostly healthy.
On the one hand it shouldn't be too hard: 3 months in Italy changed my palate so I no longer have a raging sweet tooth and most other junk food doesn't hold a draw for me either. Since I'm still summer-job-less I have plenty of extra time to get a workout in every day.
One of my biggest challenges is my aversion to running. I have never understood people who can just get up and run 5 miles. As far as sports go I've played volleyball, kicked ass as a soccer keeper, and spent the last two years of high school learning to be a fish on the swim team. See a trend? There's next to no running involved in any of them. Its the chicken and the egg question: what came first my love of these sports or my distaste for running?
So to try to get over this, I'm doing a modified version of the Couch to 5K program (check it out at the link below). Instead of going exactly with the time part of it, I do distance intervals since I usually run on the beach and have these nifty lifeguard towers as my check points. With any luck, by the end of the summer, I'll actually be able to run straight from one pier to the other.
http://www.c25k.com/
Thursday, May 30, 2013
A 21st Birthday
Hooray! Today I impart on my 21st year of life!
Most people are beyond thrilled this day. I mean, you get to buy alcohol, and go to bars, and... and... its legal!
Sorry, that's just not me. Alcohol has never been taboo for me. My parents were giving me wine mixed with water at dinner since I was a toddler, I've been sipping my dad's scotch since I was old enough to voice a question, and we had a general don't ask, don't tell policy in my house that only had the exception of jail time for serious trouble. (Nobody has gone this far yet, so I can't say exactly what the consequences would be. I just know that if we were ever to get arrested, we shouldn't waste our phone call on our parents.)
All this put together means I never had that burning teenage rebellious phase where I went out and got rip roaring drunk, even when I got to college. Sure I drank, but not the way most teenage girls do: wildly imbibing anything and everything to get as wasted as possible.
When it comes to alcohol I tend to skip the beer kegs and binge drinking. Wine, rum, and tequila are the 3 drinks for me: tequila for shots, rum for cocktails, and wine anytime (there's a reason I studied abroad in Italy). Not that I snub every other kind of alcohol, but usually I'm a strong believer of a time and place for every drink.
Oh, also the whole drinking in public think may have lost its novelty in the last 3 months where drinking wine was not only allowed, but expected at dinner. And nobody ever carded you. Yeah, those were the times.
Most people are beyond thrilled this day. I mean, you get to buy alcohol, and go to bars, and... and... its legal!
Sorry, that's just not me. Alcohol has never been taboo for me. My parents were giving me wine mixed with water at dinner since I was a toddler, I've been sipping my dad's scotch since I was old enough to voice a question, and we had a general don't ask, don't tell policy in my house that only had the exception of jail time for serious trouble. (Nobody has gone this far yet, so I can't say exactly what the consequences would be. I just know that if we were ever to get arrested, we shouldn't waste our phone call on our parents.)
All this put together means I never had that burning teenage rebellious phase where I went out and got rip roaring drunk, even when I got to college. Sure I drank, but not the way most teenage girls do: wildly imbibing anything and everything to get as wasted as possible.
When it comes to alcohol I tend to skip the beer kegs and binge drinking. Wine, rum, and tequila are the 3 drinks for me: tequila for shots, rum for cocktails, and wine anytime (there's a reason I studied abroad in Italy). Not that I snub every other kind of alcohol, but usually I'm a strong believer of a time and place for every drink.
Oh, also the whole drinking in public think may have lost its novelty in the last 3 months where drinking wine was not only allowed, but expected at dinner. And nobody ever carded you. Yeah, those were the times.
Wednesday, May 29, 2013
A Bookaholic
"Hi my name's Jackie, and I'm a bookaholic"
(Hi, Jackie)
"Its been four hours since I finished my last book, and I'm not sure how much longer I can go. I've got 4 books on my bookshelf right now and another waiting to be picked up tomorrow..."
But seriously people, I've got a problem. I average about a book every 3 days, and that's only because I do occasionally have to participate in the real world and do things like work and go to class. During the summer, I average a book and a half a day. Yeah, it's bad.
How can I help it though when I've got such easy access to so many books? Not only do I have all the books my family has collected in the past 25 years, but then there's regular book stores, $1 book stores, summer book sales, the LA county library, the online database for the library, and Goodreads behind it all telling me there are more books out there then I could ever hope to read! I guess a part of me started to realized I'd have to join the real world soon and started consuming as many books and stories as I could before it was too late.
Now, I'm a English Literature major, so I get my fill of "classics," and I genuinely enjoy those. (It's hard to find me a book I don't enjoy. If you've got some sort of plot line and a little character development, I'll bite). However, left to my own devices for so long, I tend to lean toward the Young Adult genre and toward the paranormal, fantasy, and sci-fi divisions of that.
But because I acknowledge that I have a problem, I've decided that since I read a lot more than any normal person does to begin with, I should start being constructive in my reading habits. Does that mean I'm going to give up my dirty vampire books? No, definitely not. What it does mean is that I'm aiming at 1 out of every 10 books I read coming from my learn to live life shelf, or as I've labeled it, my "quarter-life-crisis" shelf, because that is honestly what I'm going through. This shelf is a compilation of reading lists I've found with names like "20 Books for Girls in Their 20s" and "Career Books Every Young Woman Needs to Read." 1 in 10 may seem like I'm not going to get anywhere, but what that really translates to is about 1 of these books every other week. I've already read half the books on these lists, but the other half of them and I are about to become very closely acquainted. Those are the books that I'll probably chat about here (because really, if I don't write something about books, then I'm not talking about a very large part of my life).
(Hi, Jackie)
"Its been four hours since I finished my last book, and I'm not sure how much longer I can go. I've got 4 books on my bookshelf right now and another waiting to be picked up tomorrow..."
But seriously people, I've got a problem. I average about a book every 3 days, and that's only because I do occasionally have to participate in the real world and do things like work and go to class. During the summer, I average a book and a half a day. Yeah, it's bad.
How can I help it though when I've got such easy access to so many books? Not only do I have all the books my family has collected in the past 25 years, but then there's regular book stores, $1 book stores, summer book sales, the LA county library, the online database for the library, and Goodreads behind it all telling me there are more books out there then I could ever hope to read! I guess a part of me started to realized I'd have to join the real world soon and started consuming as many books and stories as I could before it was too late.
Now, I'm a English Literature major, so I get my fill of "classics," and I genuinely enjoy those. (It's hard to find me a book I don't enjoy. If you've got some sort of plot line and a little character development, I'll bite). However, left to my own devices for so long, I tend to lean toward the Young Adult genre and toward the paranormal, fantasy, and sci-fi divisions of that.
But because I acknowledge that I have a problem, I've decided that since I read a lot more than any normal person does to begin with, I should start being constructive in my reading habits. Does that mean I'm going to give up my dirty vampire books? No, definitely not. What it does mean is that I'm aiming at 1 out of every 10 books I read coming from my learn to live life shelf, or as I've labeled it, my "quarter-life-crisis" shelf, because that is honestly what I'm going through. This shelf is a compilation of reading lists I've found with names like "20 Books for Girls in Their 20s" and "Career Books Every Young Woman Needs to Read." 1 in 10 may seem like I'm not going to get anywhere, but what that really translates to is about 1 of these books every other week. I've already read half the books on these lists, but the other half of them and I are about to become very closely acquainted. Those are the books that I'll probably chat about here (because really, if I don't write something about books, then I'm not talking about a very large part of my life).
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